


The Boyfriend Bluff

by kethni



Category: Veep (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Post-Canon, request fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-23
Updated: 2020-12-23
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:20:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,662
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28267527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kethni/pseuds/kethni
Summary: Kent scowled at her as the door swung shut. ‘What just happened?’‘I think your friend assumed that we are dating.’‘If she did then it was not without your encouragement,’ he complained.Sue finished the glass of wine. ‘The phrase you are looking for is “thank you” and I will think of a way for you to make it up to me.’
Relationships: Kent Davison/Sue Wilson
Comments: 2
Kudos: 3





	The Boyfriend Bluff

**Author's Note:**

> With thanks to crazymaryt for the suggestion.

There were certain types of events that Sue only ever went to for work. Political events, obviously, but also charity events. She hadn’t chosen to go to any kind of charity event on her own volition since she was in college. She had been brought up with a somewhat… old fashioned beliefs about charity. She could not imagine leaving politics and then voluntarily going to this kind of charity event; the kind where the organisers insisted on a black-tie dress code and practically turned people upside down and shook them for all the money that would drop from their pockets.

She was baffled then, more baffled than she would have expected, to see Kent Davison. He wasn’t out with the guests but in the little maze of offices behind the scenes. Sue was finalising a few of the last-minute details with her liaison. The sort of thing that Gary would have done, once upon a time. She walked out into the cramped little corridor and saw Kent cross from one office to another.

She almost didn’t recognise him. He wasn’t in evening dress. He wasn’t even in a suit and tie.

‘Who was that?’ Sue asked her liaison, but the other woman was distracted by her cell.

‘I’m sorry?’

Sue pursed her lips. ‘I thought I saw a former colleague.’

‘Oh, I don’t know everyone involved.’

They strode towards the stairs at the end of the corridor. As they passed the door Kent had gone through, Sue glanced through it. There were a cluster of people in the room. The only one she really registered was Naomi Rodriguez, sat on the desk, facing the door. She was wearing a golden evening dress and sky-high stilettos. Her face was prominently displayed in all the adverts for the evening. Enough that it had irritated Selina. Not that irritating Selina was difficult these days.

Upstairs in the main auditorium, Selina and her staffers were the centre of an expanding, invisible forcefield into which none of the other guests ventured. This was supposed to be an olive branch of sorts. An appeal to the sort of people who, before her election, would have traditionally voted for her while holding their noses. Their support had always been grudging but now it was slipping into non-existent and she had only herself to blame.

Sue realised that there was nobody that she could talk to about having seen Kent. At least nobody who would care in any way. She pursed her lips and texted Amy. It was a poor substitute, but she supposed it was better than nothing.

_Was he carrying a weapon?_

Sue frowned. _Not that I saw._

_Shame_

_I don’t think that is funny._

_Whos laughing?_

***

While the ridiculous auction was going on Sue slipped back into the maze of offices and corridors. These places were all the same: glitz and glamour at the front but threadbare carpets and lumpy paintwork in the back.

There were people around, but they were mostly rushing around with the air of people who had far too much to do to wonder who she was or what she was doing there. If Sue had been security minded, then it might have worried her.

She heard the low almost monotone of his voice and followed it to a door with a grubby, glass window. She gave the door a perfunctory tap as she opened the door.

Kent was sprawled on a chair, talking on a landline telephone. He was dressed in cream chinos and a loose black shirt. He blinked when he saw her and told the person on the telephone that he’d call them back.

‘Good Lord, you must be lost.’

‘I was thinking the same thing.’ 

He stood up a little self-consciously. She saw him glance at the other chair, clearly wondering if he should offer her a seat.

‘Why are you skulking about back here?’ Sue asked.

‘Well, I _was_ arranging for the photographs from the event to be sent out to the usual media outlets,’ he said. ‘I assume that you are part of POTUS’s ensemble.’

‘The increasingly small ensemble,’ Sue said, with a sniff.

He waggled his hand. ‘Exclusive sounds better.’

She smiled slightly. ‘You’ve been out of politics for five minutes and you’ve forgotten that she needs to pretend to be inclusive not exclusive.’

He winced. ‘That ship has sailed.’

There was a brief tap on the door, and someone brought in a pile of papers for Kent.

‘Are you _working_ here?’ Sue asked incredulously.

‘Volunteering,’ he said. ‘Be very suspicious of charities with significant staffs of paid employees.’

She put her hand on her hip. ‘Why?’

He looked surprised. ‘They tend to spend quite a lot of money on salaries which could go towards whatever cause they are supposedly supporting.’

‘Why are you volunteering _anywhere_ ,’ she asked. ‘You’re not a bored housewife.’

‘Not even a desperate one,’ he said. ‘Although…’

Sue scowled at him. ‘I think that you are being deliberately obtuse.’

He shrugged. ‘I think that you’re being deliberately grouchy,’ he said lightly. ‘Naomi asked me to help out. She’s very good at being the face of things but when it comes to organisation, she’s not entirely… organised.’

‘Naomi Rodriguez?’

‘Sure,’ he said. ‘She wasn’t thrilled about POTUS coming along but she did pay for a table.’

Sue put her hand on her hip. ‘POTUS wasn’t invited?’

Kent laughed. ‘Oh, no. Absolutely not. She’s been letting Buddy Calhoun and his coterie ride completely roughshod over all kinds of rights. If Selina wants to play act at being an ally, then she can pay for the privilege.’

‘Why aren’t you properly dressed?’ she asked.

‘You sound like my mother,’ he said dryly. ‘I’m dressed properly. I’m wearing underwear and everything.’

Sue’s lips twitched. ‘You’re drunk.’

‘Nope,’ he said. ‘I’m just not currently crushed into the corporate/political monolith.’

Sue sat down. ‘You could at least offer me some of whatever it is that you’re drinking.’

‘I get the distinct feeling that you’re only listening to about one word in ten,’ he said mildly.

‘You should talk less nonsense,’ Sue suggested.

Kent snorted. ‘Wait here.’

‘If I must.’

As he left the room, Sue looked around. There was no sign of anything remotely personal in the office. It was clear that this was purely a space that had been hired for the event. It had always taken her by surprise how much Kent insisted on feeling his workspace with personal items and identifiers. For someone that so many people derided as having no personality, he was very invested in stamping it everywhere that he could.

The door opened again as Kent returned with a bottle of wine and two plastic glasses.

‘I stole these from the kitchen,’ he said confidentially.

‘How daring of you.’

He sat down and poured two glasses of wine. ‘Why are you wandering down here?’

‘I was curious to see why you were wandering around down here,’ she replied.

‘I’m flattered that you still have some vague and passing interest in the fact that I exist.’

Sue crossed her legs and sipped the wine. The best that she could say was that it wasn’t warm.

There was a flurry of voices outside that grew gradually louder until the door was flung open. Naomi Rodriquez blocked the door as she was still talking to people in the corridor.

‘Mia, close the door, you’re letting in a draught,’ Kent complained.

‘You’re getting old,’ Sue murmured to him.

‘We’re all getting older, that’s how the passage of time works,’ he retorted.

Naomi waved off the people outside and pushed the door shut. ‘My feet are killing me.’

‘I told you not to wear those shoes,’ Kent said unsympathetically.

Naomi pulled out a battered chair and sat down heavily. She lifted her feet and plonked them onto Kent’s lap.

‘I can hardly wear flats. I have an image you know.’

Kent unstrapped her shoes and began rubbing her feet.

Naomi looked at Sue. ‘Hello. I don’t think that I know you.’

‘Rude,’ Kent murmured.

‘Rude is you not introducing us when I came in,’ Naomi said.

Sue pursed her lips. ‘I’m Sue. I work for the President.’

Naomi cocked her head. ‘You have my sympathies.’

‘Sue and I used to work together,’ Kent said to Naomi. ‘Naomi and I grew up together,’ he said to Sue.

Sue raised her eyebrows. ‘That doesn’t seem to be physically possible.’

Naomi sniggered. ‘Honey, I’m wearing five pounds of makeup and a very expensive hair dye. Plus, one of us spent their twenties doing all of the pot and _all_ of the ladies. Turns out that can wear on a body.’

‘Envy is an unflattering look,’ Kent said mildly.

‘You know that “envy” was never the problem,’ Naomi said. She groaned as her cell chimed. ‘Time to go pretend that I’m a sweet and shining soul.’

Kent strapped her shoes again and she stood up.

‘You’re going to change, right?’ Naomi said to Kent.

He looked at her blankly.

‘For the afterparty. There are some ladies I want to introduce you to.’ 

He groaned. ‘Please stop attempting that.’

‘Nope,’ she said. ‘It’s been long enough since Julie died. You need to go out and meet more ladies. Sooner or later one of them will appreciate you.’ Naomi opened the door.

‘Why do you assume that he hasn’t already done so?’ Sue asked.

Naomi looked back at Sue over her shoulder. ‘Did I ask why you were lurking here with Kent?’

Sue crossed her legs. ‘You did not.’

‘Uh…’ Kent began.

Naomi shrugged. ‘Please make sure he gets changed before the party.’

‘Of course,’ Sue said.

Kent scowled at her as the door swung shut. ‘What just happened?’

‘I think your friend assumed that we are dating.’

‘If she did then it was not without your encouragement,’ he complained.

Sue finished the glass of wine. ‘The phrase you are looking for is “thank you” and I will think of a way for you to make it up to me.’

‘She’s going to realise when we don’t go to the afterparty,’ he protested.

Sue raised an eyebrow. ‘Then we should go to afterparty, don’t you think?’ She stood up. ‘I’ll give the President an excuse and we can go to your home and get you changed.’

Kent put his hands on his hips. ‘Do I have any say in this whatsoever?’

‘You can say thank you,’ Sue said.

‘Why would you even want to go to the afterparty?’

She rolled her eyes. ‘Why would I want to go to an afterparty being hosted by a burlesque drag queen and her friends? What kind of a question is that?’

***

It hadn’t occurred to Sue that Kent was no longer living in D.C. and had simply taken a hotel room for the night. She followed him into the room and sat on the bed as he stamped over to the wardrobe and yanked open the door.

‘Why are you in such a bad mood?’

‘I wasn’t going to go to the afterparty,’ he grumbled.

‘I think we both know that you were,’ she said. ‘Even if Naomi put you over her shoulder and carried you.’

He paused for a moment and she was quite sure that he was picturing it. ‘Quite possibly.’

‘Are these ladies that she introduces you to drag queens or…’

‘They’re generally biological women,’ Kent said. ‘Although that is generally the only thing any of them have in common.’

‘Do you not have a type?’

‘I’m sure that I have several,’ Kent said. ‘Naomi appears entirely indifferent to the concept and instead merely flings random women at me.’ He held up two shirts to her.

‘That one,’ Sue said. ‘And the fact that you brought several dress shirts with you simply proves that you always knew that you would end up going to the afterparty.’

He threw her a sour look. ‘I am not going to be shamed for attempting to cover all the bases.’

‘What ties do you have?’

He shook his head. ‘I don’t have any ties.’

‘Why not?’

‘It’s a party,’ he said. ‘The only people who even countenance wearing ties to parties are politicians and the like.’

She pursed her lips. ‘I suppose that you might have a point. I always think that a dress shirt without a tie looks unfinished however.’

‘I am never wearing another tie,’ he said firmly. He ducked into the bathroom to change his clothes.

‘Don’t be ridiculous.’

‘I’m not. Wearing a tie is ridiculous. It’s a facile tradition that we should jettison.’ His voice was slightly muffled by the closed door and Sue couldn’t tell from his tone if he was being serious.

‘If I have to wear heels then you have to wear a tie.’

He opened the door and stuck his head around. ‘I have a better suggestion: I don’t wear ties and you don’t wear heels.’

Sue blinked. ‘What?’

‘They’re extremely bad for your lower legs and feet,’ he said. ‘They’re also linked with large numbers of accidents every year. We need to free ourselves of the oppression of unnecessary and ridiculous clothing traditions.’

She raised an eyebrow. ‘You’re drunk.’

‘Nope, just not tied to the outmoded traditions of traditional clothing enforced by the political and mercantile class.’

‘No wonder Naomi can’t get anyone to date you,’ Sue said tartly. ‘You sound like a college freshman.’

He smiled slightly. ‘I’ve been called worse.’

‘I’ll try harder,’ she said.

He stepped out of the bathroom, futzing with his sleeves. He did look good. She would have never said so to him, but he did. It was quite annoying.

***

The music spilled out onto the street, but it wasn’t the sort of music that she expected. If she had been asked, then she would have said that she would have expect loud dance music or pop music. This was jazz.

She looked sideways at Kent. ‘I thought you hated this kind of music.’

‘I do,’ he said with a sigh. ‘You do recall that I didn’t want to come to this.’

‘Because of the music?’

He shook his head. ‘The music is merely one component.’

At the door they had to give their names. The drag artist would likely have been taller than them even without the platform boots, but with she they towered over thwm.

‘Something bothering you, sweetie?’ she asked, managing somehow to make the question sound slightly aggressive despite the actual words.

‘I’m glad that I don’t have to see people scalps all night,’ Sue said. ‘You must see a lot of dirty hair.’

The drag artist snickered. ‘Lot of bad weaves too.’

Sue felt a muscle twitch in her cheek and didn’t look at Kent. She knew that he was trying not to laugh. She could _feel_ it.

Inside the club, Kent leaned in a little closer. ‘I’m sure that was just a joke,’ he said.

‘Really.’

‘I can’t imagine that you have ever used a cheap weave,’ he said.

She straightened her shoulders. ‘I do not use weaves at all.’

‘Of course,’ he said.

‘Don’t humour me,’ she demanded.

Kent raised his eyebrows. ‘I can’t believe you and not humour you,’ he said. ‘The two things are contradictory.’

She scowled at him. ‘Why am I putting up with you when we no longer work together?’

He shrugged. ‘Because you thought it would be fun to come to the afterparty without actually considering that the somewhat _piquant_ humour that generally attends these events might at some point be aimed at you.’

‘That was a rhetorical question,’ she complained.

Kent shrugged. ‘It’s still true.’

Naomi waved at them from across the room.

‘How long are we telling her that we’ve been dating?’ Kent asked.

‘Oh, now you want to go through with it?’

He pulled a face. ‘I really don’t want to be set up with random women.’

She pursed her lips. ‘Only a few weeks or she’ll wonder why you haven’t mentioned me before. But we admit our previous relationship. That should cover most bases.’

‘Famous last words,’ he muttered.

***

‘We dated for a short while some time ago,’ Sue said, eyeing a bottle of vodka that was being carried past. ‘We reconnected recently.’

Naomi snorted. ‘We’re all very well aware about that previous disaster,’ she said.

Sue looked at Kent, who had taken a moment to grab the vodka. ‘Disaster?’

It was difficult to tell in the dim lighting, but she thought that he was flushed. Although given the noise and the amount that he’d drunk it was quite possible that it had nothing to do with the conversation.

‘We didn’t have the most _painless_ breakup,’ he said mildly.

‘Screw the breakup,’ Naomi said. ‘The dating was toxic!’ She poked her finger at Sue. ‘Just because it’s his nature to damn well subsume himself in a relationship doesn’t mean you should take advantage of it.’

‘Naomi!’ Kent snapped. ‘Don’t talk to her like that.’

‘I am not responsible for how Kent did or did not comport himself in our relationship,’ Sue said stiffly. ‘Do you imagine that I began dating a powerful and confident man in the hope that he would instead reveal himself as a self-doubting mess in need of constant reassurance?’

Kent blew out his cheeks. ‘I should have stayed in the hotel.’

Naomi adjusted the strap on her dress. ‘Why are you even dating him again if that’s how you feel?’

Sue forced herself not to look in Kent’s direction. ‘I missed him. When we broke up, I primarily remembered the frustrations and the pain. As time went passed, I remembered more of the good things. That’s all I have to say about it.’

‘Is it my time to be interrogated?’ Kent asked dryly.

Naomi pulled a face. ‘Please. We all know exactly why you’d go crawling back.’ She shook her head. ‘How long have you been in therapy and you still don’t have the self-esteem of an ant.’

Kent took the cocktail out of her hand. ‘You’ve had far too much to drink. Go and drink water until you’re no longer aggressive and unpleasant.’

Sue expected an explosion and for a moment it appeared that she might see one. Instead, Naomi took a deep breath, and then stomped off towards a table.

‘I’m sorry,’ Kent said. ‘She shouldn’t have said any of that.’

Sue shook her head. ‘Don’t apologise for her. She’s a grown-up.’

He sipped his drink. ‘Do you want to dance?’

‘You hate dancing,’ she pointed out.

He shrugged. ‘You don’t and I don’t think that you’re having a very nice evening.’

Sue glanced over to the dancefloor. ‘Try not to stamp on my feet.’

‘I promise nothing.’

She smiled at him anyway.

***

They emerged into the dawn, stumbling in the sudden darkness, and shivering in the cool air. Sue let go of her tight grip on Kent’s hand and instead slipped her arm through his.

‘Where are you living now?’ Kent asked. The first word was too loud. It dropped into the still air like a rock in a puddle. He dropped his voice immediately but moved his mouth a little closer to her ear.

‘The same place,’ she said. Her heels were very loud on the sidewalk.

Kent dug his hand into his pocket. ‘I’ll call an Uber.’

Sue brushed her hair behind her ear. ‘I hope you’re going to walk me inside.’

He looked at her blankly.

Sue adjusted his collar.

‘Oh,’ he said. ‘Absolutely.’

‘You didn’t say that Naomi was wrong,’ she said, as he tapped on his cell.

Kent shook his head. ‘She gets very intense when she’s been drinking.’

‘You do have the self-esteem of an ant,’ Sue said.

He frowned. ‘I refute that. I’m sure that ants have an entirely healthy sense of self-esteem. They’re very hard-working creatures.’

‘Don’t they devote themselves entirely to the will of their queen?’ she asked tartly.

He looked up from his cell. ‘You may have a point.’

‘Arguably an individual ant has _no_ sense of self,’ she continued.

Kent pursed his lips. ‘Are you suggesting that I have no sense of self?’

‘Naomi seemed to think so, at least as far as our relationship goes,’ she said. ‘Are you different in other relationships?’

Kent blew out his cheeks. ‘I’m not sure that I’m the best person to answer that question. It is something that I have been working on.’

Sue raised her eyebrows. ‘Are you seeking _therapy_?’

He nodded. ‘I have been for some time since Julie died. It began as a way of processing that but there have been other issues that have come up during the sessions.’

‘Oh,’ she said. ‘It’s never been something that I found necessary.’

He smirked a little. ‘The great Sue Wilson would never need to work on herself.’

‘Absolutely not.’ She took his arm again. ‘When is that Uber going to arrive?’

‘Three minutes,’ he said, gently squeezing her arm.

***

Kent walked around the car to open her door. She had missed that he did that. She knew that it wasn’t that he thought she was incapable or any ridiculous nonsense like that. It was purely good manners which, given Kent’s generally mediocre social skills, was something to be appreciated.

The steps were glazed with a thin layer of ice. The sole of her shoe slid, and she fought for her balance. Kent caught her by the waist and steadied her. He looked into her face and smiled.

‘Are you alright?’

‘I’m not dressed for ice skating,’ she said tartly.

‘Maybe another time,’ he suggested.

They kissed on the doorstep. His left hand cupped her cheek and his right hand rested lightly on her waist.

‘In the morning, I won’t be able to spend much time,’ she murmured. ‘I’ll have to get to work.’

She felt his mouth move as he smiled.

‘I understand.’

‘Good.’ She pulled away to unlock the door. Then she reached back to take his hand and pull him into the house.

The End.


End file.
